Those Red Satin Knickers

My knitting group is a very light-hearted affair and we spend more time laughing than we do knitting and no one attempts complicated patterns for fear of making a mistake.  I take all my knitting gear in a fabric shopping bag and when I put something in the bag it tends to stay there so my bag has become something of a joke since I can usually produce knickknacks like stitch markers, needle gauges etc. and one day someone suggested that among my possessions I probably had a pair of scarlet knickers.  I denied this but suddenly remembered my red satin frilly bikini knickers and promised to produce them at the next meeting, which I did.

How did I, a senior citizen, come to be in possession of a pair of red satin frilly knickers?

In the olden days when I was still working there was a Ponzi scheme amongst the staff.  One of those chain letter sorts of things where you received a letter with three names and addresses and instructions to copy the letter into three sheets of paper, delete the name on the bottom and add your own to the top, send a handkerchief to each of the people on your list and post your three new letters to your worst enemy and eventually you should receive 1,000 handkerchiefs.

Of course, it never works that way because mostly people throw their letters into the bin and send no handkerchiefs.  However the one I found myself a part of was not handkerchiefs but knickers and along with your name and address you needed to list the size of the knickers you wore.  Needless to say  -  everyone (except me) lied about the size of their knickers. Sadly I only received two pairs in all  but ….

The first pair fitted the first time I wore them but shrank to tiny after being washed but the other pair was a gorgeous red satin frilly bikini which was very comfortable and oh, so cool in summer so that when I moved into my apartment I couldn’t bear to part with them and for old time’s sake I packed them along with the rest of the clothes I brought with me.  And  promptly forgot about them.

As requested I produced them for the knitters and they were much admired and, I thought, forgotten. 

Last week, because I had given a spinning lesson to a friend of one of the group I was telling people about spinning equipment and was asked to bring my niddy-noddy along to the next session.  It clean went out of my mind so I popped back to get it (I live just across the road from the place where the knitting group meets) and I was asked to bring my red satin, frilly knickers for someone who had missed out on the first viewing a few weeks previously.  They are now back in my undies drawer shining their light under a bushel of regular knickers.